‘’I wished to have a “normal” family but I guess I wasn’t destined to .I have a step MOM and many step sisters and brothers. Some are great.. It’s all weird.We are almost closing school. I hope that one of my fav step-brother will come home. That I will meet new friends and attend a teens fellowship at my church and maybe start a praise and worship team at church. Guess what happened,he came on the first Sunday of my holiday. I was so happy to see him. I also went to teens on that Sunday. Haiya, I met new friends and most were boys. (wink) You can imagine the horror. Some were definitely not my age. There is this one guy who looked at me in a fishy way, I’ve always known when a guy liked me (NOT TRUE).He greeted me in a nice respectful way. The topic for the meeting was the delicate issue which affects most teenagers. SEX!!!!!Many questions ran through our minds;
1)Why should we not do it?
2) How does it feel like?
3) Why should we wait? Everyone is doing it.
I realized that we are uncomfortable to talk about SEX and yet God created it. I learnt so much about the boys and girls there. They are deeply affected by this. By the way I like the guy too ,but he is a bit older. Man, there are fine men out there!!!!!I one day want the courage to stand up and speak in public and be myself and not worry who’s looking. But seriously I do not know how to socialize with boys but I love boys. I love boys because they are easy, understanding and simple. Well, this is just the beginning of a life in store for me.
I love Jesus. I will like to acknowledge that. Guess I gotta sleep.’’
No one chooses the family that they land and find themselves in.We do not choose our parents.God makes that choice for us.And God is perfect.H e does not make mistakes.He is a good God.Families are diverse and flat out weird.Everyone comes from one.Even the worst of them still has LOVE in it.I thought I came from the worst of it.At times it felt so.But I never doubted the love.My family is BLENDED (step family). We basically share a dad and are blessed with two moms.I know not most would like to be in such a situation and some are probably judging this situation.Don’t you worry,that used to be me.And this also could be someone else’ truth.It always felt weird trying to explain why we were so many.
I grew up with a lot of questions.Wondering why did God have to put me in such a situation.Why no one bothers to explain the situations.Its until grew up a bit that i am now able to understand and look at it with grace.Life is messy and families are messier.God having put me in this situation pretty much wanted to stretch me.To stretch my love for people that I did not feel related to.To accept people as they come.Even my parents.To love the sinner and not the sin.To judge not.Accepting people in whatever way that they came to my life.That how can I love GOD whom I have never seen and hate my brother/sister that I see.Its a fact that the generations ahead of as will be coupled up with blended families with either similar or different situations than this.My parents, esp my mom taught me to LOVE regardless.Whether we share a father or NOT.Whether you came before or after.Families are expressions of love and we judge and complain because we seek perfection in an imperfect world.Love your crazy,issued and roller coaster-ed family and the more we love like Jesus loves us,the more it is transformed.FOR WE ARE PERFECTLY BLENDED!
Oh my, meeting boys was just one of the weirdest moments in my life.I JUST DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO ACT.(LOL)I t was so awkward.I was so shy.It was so hard for me to speak in public at that time esp around my peers.Worrying about what people would think of my “saved opinions’’. That I wouldn’t be cool anymore.That I’d rather shut up and leave them wondering.It was so easy being saved at home than in school guys.The pressure was real esp with my weird short hair and crazy #foreheadgame.WOW!Its funny how life changes.How we are just WORK IN PROGRESS.The amount of growth in my interactions,confidence and public speaking.The acceptance that I have for myself.The courage that at times looks so small that I have gained.I can only smile and thank GOD.For I am unashamedly flawed and not ashamed of Him.That I long to just open my mouth and go on and on about His love and the standards for life that He set.Standards that look too high but through His grace I fall and He picks me up and He says try again.I GOT YOU.
I AM NOT ASHAMED OF MY FAMILY,MY PERSONALITY ,GOD’S STANDARDS THAT HAVE BECOME MINE AND MOST IMPORTANTLY I AM NOT ASHAMED OF HIM.
WE ARE STILL BECOMING.⊕